Kus sa praegu olla tahaksid?

"Where do you want to be right now?" I was asked this question during my last Estonian lecture and I drew a blank. I couldn't think of anywhere else I would rather be right now than in Estonia.

Yeah, it's been hard. And, yeah Estonia keeps kicking me in the teeth. But, I always forgive Estonia and somehow - love it more is the wrong phrase - grow more attached to it - is better.

Estonia has made me laugh and cry. Estonia has embarrassed and humbled me. Estonia has broken my heart. But, at the same time, Estonia has become a part of me. A part of me I won't soon forget.

I've heard it said that to truly speak the Estonian language you really have to feel Estonian. I'm inclined to believe that with all my suffering - I'm getting close. In an article written for National Geographic, Baroness Irina Ungern-Sternberg encapsulates the Estonian spirit with these words:

When thousands of Estonian voices unite in singing folk songs born of the clouds and cold of the north, one senses the power that lies within - the willingness to suffer rather than yield. It is in the Estonian voice that the national soul is revealed, deep, patient, and full of faith.