The Bronze Disaster

Estonia to Russia:

"Thank you for freeing us from Nazi Germany. No thank you for commandeering our independence."

The unasuming bronze statue of a soldier used to stand in Tonismagi Valjak in Tallinn, Estonia. The problem? The soldier also stood for, in the minds of many Estonians, the Soviet regime whose iron fist ruled Estonia from 1944 to 1991.

The Bronze Soldier has been removed from the square, but not the minds of the people of Estonia. As the unrest mounts, I return to Tallinn on May 3.

8 Days and Counting

I leave for Estonia in 8 days. 8 days to pack up my things, say good-bye to my friends, say good-bye to a job that I have grown accustomed to these last 4 years (and 8 months). Say good-bye to what has essentially been my comfort zone since leaving my parents' nest.

But it won't be the first time I've done this. I will be returning to Estonia for the second time. When I left at the end of the summer of 2006, I felt like I was being ripped from my home and the new life that I had created for myself. I never felt as homesick for America as I have for Estonia. I miss pankookid, and the sea, and my best friend Bridget ("Estonia Bridge" as she was affectionately called). Mostly, I think I missed the independence of it all. The free will to make the choices that I chose - and not being tied to a job that I despised. I missed the trust and confidence that I recieved from my peers, and the trust, confidence and kindness that I freely returned.

I'm so excited to go back that I'm nearly bursting!! This time will be different though. I will be watching the infant baby of some friends that I made while I was there before. In return, they will finance my habits - eating, drinking, sleeping in a comfortable bed.

I've spent the last 8 months living in a life that I have outgrown. I've never had too much patience for patience. I think I'm ready to get on with my life and I will be doing just that...in 8 days.